Santa banta Jokes

टीचर: जिस हिसाब से आपके बेटे के नम्बर आते हैं उस हिसाब से एक बात तो मैं यकीन से कह सकती हूँ!
संता: क्या?
टीचर: वह नकल बिल्कुल नहीं मारता!

संता: तुम एक बार में कितने आदमी उठा सकते हो?
पहलवान: कम से कम 16!
संता: धत, तुमसे अच्छा तो मेरा मुर्गा है जो सुबह पूरे मोहल्ले को उठा देता है!

संता: इंडियन फिल्म इंडस्ट्री में सबसे पहला किसका ईमेल आई डी था?
बंता: नहीं पता?
संता: शम्मी कपूर! क्योंकि वो ही सबसे पहले बोला याहूऊऊऊऊ ...!

Season 1 - Jokes on Baniya

What is faster then a 1 rupee coin descending down the hill?
A Baniya running behind it.

Baniya ne sheikh ko khoon dey k uski jaan bachai.
Sheikh ne usay MERCEDEZ gift kardi.
Sheikh ko phir khoon ki zarorut pari,
Baniya ne phir khoon dia.
Ab k bar Sheikh ne till waly laddu gift kiye,
Baniya:Ghusse se, mercedez kion nahi di?
Sheikh:Munna...!! Ab hamarey ander bhi baniye ka khoon dor raha hay

Baniya ask to Taxi Driver: CP wale gurudware jayega kya?
Taxi Driver: Han jaon ga.
Baniya ne jaib se lunchbox nikala or kaha:
Wapsi main langar ka khana lete aana.

Teacher: Tumhare papa 500 rupees loan lete hai. 10% interest ke hisab se woh 1 saal baad loan vapis karte hai. Batao kitne paise vapis karenge?
Bania’s son: Kuch bhi nahi.
Teacher: Tum maths nahi jante.
Banis’s son: Main toh maths janta hoon, par aap mere papa ko nahi jante.

Season 2 - Wife-Husband Jokes

Wife to husband, "U don't LOVE Me at all."
Husband points towards their 5 children & says,"Do u think I downloaded these from google?"..

Person and Chemist

Person: Give me Poison
Chemist: Show prescription
Person: Shows Marriage Card
Chemist: Pagle rulaayega kya, choti bottle duin ya badi.

Season 1 - Jokes on Marriage

'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing.. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.' --- Anonymous

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. ---Rodney Dangerfield

'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.' ---Sam Kinison

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.... ---------- Nash

The great question ... which I have not been able to answer ... is, 'What does a woman want? --- Dumas

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. --- Sacha Guitry

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. ----Henny Youngman

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. ----- Anonymous

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. ---- Sigmund Freud


----------------------------------------

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.. David Bissonette

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ----- Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. --------Anonymous

I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.' --- James Holt McGavra

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.' Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
Anonymous

Why this blog

This blog has been created because I think humor is essential part of life. For nything happiness is must. And humor gives a smile to the person listening it i.e. Start towards happiness.

So this blog has been created for jokes on topic that I feel are interesting.